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Posts Tagged ‘love’

…It’s a movie, and you can watch it for free on youtube.

I’m sure your marriage/relationship will not remain the same afterwards.

PS: I hope you all had lovely Christmas celebrations (and didn’t forget the reason for the season?)…I wish you a joyful and wonderful new year 2011.

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A couple of days ago, I was going through my marriage counselling notes…meen, I had definitely forgotten some of the things I wrote in there. Thank God for grace. I decided to share some of these notes to remind us married couples, as well as help those who, though not married, are on their way there…

The very first topic the MOG discussed with us was Conflict Resolution.

young-couple-in-fight-on-bedCauses of conflict;

He said (and I do agree) that there is bound to be conflict in the home due to; misunderstanding, spending habits, lack of proper communication, un-met expectations, family background/up-bringing, in-laws, stubbornness, a domineering spirit, and the media. He pointed out though, that most times, the causes of conflict are within (i.e. inside the home, between the couple), not without.

Consequences of conflict;

Conflict leads to anger, bitterness, malice…and can degenerate further, eventually leading to separation or divorce (God forbids).Unresolved offense builds a fence in the home.

How to overcome conflict; (Matt 18: 15-17)

  • listen to your partner, don’t shut them out or talk them down.
  • the offended party should initiate the move for peace.
  • couples should try as much as possible to resolve the conflict between themselves, without involving 3rd parties.
  • don’t bottle-up your grievances, expose them. (hmm…that one’s for me)
  • resolve conflict/crises as they arise…otherwise, it could result into unbearable pressure, which is very dangerous.
  • telling your partner (that you are hurt) is not the issue…how you tell it, is….Prov 31: 26…act with wisdom.
  • don’t correct your spouse in front of others.
  • your spouse should be your best friend (mine is) and should know more about you than anyone else (uhmmm).

Good books to read; (I have read some)

  • Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus – John Gray
  • Opposites attract – Tim Laye
  • Light His/Her Fire – Ellen Kreidman
  • Financial Guide for young couples – Larry Bucket

I also did a blog search and I found this blog dedicated to a young lady’s journey down the aisle, and a little thereafter…it may be useful to check it out, especially for my unmarried/soon to be married peeps….

While we are on this issue of marriage, hubby and I saw a movie together…it’s  called Love, Sex, and Marriage…while its funny, and even hilarious in some parts, it’s truly enlightening, and educates us on some of the issues pertaining to love, sex, faithfulness, and trust in marriage…I particularly like it because it comes from a christian perspective…one of my favorite funny yet thought-provoking scenes, is below(the bedroom scene with Fred Amata and Kate Henshaw)…you should see the whole movie though…

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celebShe was a celebrity…he was not.

She was popular…he was not.

Her name and face were well known by all and sundry…his were not.

He was painfully shy…she was not.

Whenever they went out together, she was usually in front, holding his hands and pulling him along like her little brother, while he followed sheepishly, smiling shyly.

But, they were in love…they loved each other deeply.

Inspite of the fact that he was tagged “her puppy, her handbag, a gold-digger”, and other derogatory terms by the press… he loved her.

Inspite of their never having a moment of privacy, as wherever they went, they were accompanied by the paparrazi…he loved her.

He loved her…not because she was a successful actress and singer, one of the highest paid in the world in fact…but for who she really was…a charming, cheerful, and caring lady.

The fact that she was good, no, excellent, at what she did and that her hardwork had paid off greatly, was only a bonus.

She was worried. Worried that all those negative comments and statements in the press might make him leave her. Worried that he would get fed up of never having her all to himself, and decide to call it quits. She was worried.

She also loved him…he was young and fresh. He wasn’t doing bad himself…he had an art studio…he was talented. He didn’t care about her money or fame…he loved her.

But she was still worried…very worried…

Ok…back to reality! In the early hours of this morning, while still sleeping, the image of a beautiful lady holding onto the hand of a rather shy looking guy while they were being photographed, flashed through my mind. I woke up with a decision to develop it into a story of some sort…I hope you like it…

Suggested further reading;

Flash Back…

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