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There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. — W. Somerset Maugham

Perhaps this is why I’ve struggled with novel-writing?

I have exciting stories swimming about in my head, but when I try to put pen to paper (or keypad to screen) they just FREEZE. It’s so irritating.

So Myne, Lara, Tolulope and all the other novel-writing gurus out there – WHAT is the secret???

He’s hurting me bad Lord…very bad.

 

And I want to hurt him too.

I want to hurt him so much that people would wonder what he has done

to warrant so much pain and hurt.

But you keep holding me back.

You keep holding me back, and it hurts.

It hurts to not be able to visit some hurt and pain on him too.

It hurts to not be able to go ahead and do the things I want to do to hurt

him, and make him know how it feels to be hurt.

It hurts to not be able to show him that he’s not the only one with power

and connections.

It hurts to not be able to wield my own form of power against him.

Oh, it hurts to not be able to hurt him back.

I keep wondering;

Why is it ok for him to hurt me, but not for me to hurt him back?

I thought “Vengeance is mine”. Says the Lord.

No?

Vengeance is mine, says the Lord

Oh, Ok.

So what do I do with this pain in my heart?

What do I do with this pain that’s so deep, it burns in my innermost

being?

I can’t live with this pain anymore Lord. I need to get it out of me.

But, how?

“Come to me all you that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you

rest”

But I’ve come to you several times.

I’ve handed it over to you a million times.

I’ve surrendered all like a hundred times.

No?

Not ALL?

Aaaaaaaargh!

 

Cast your burdens upon Jesus, for He cares for you.

Cast ALL your burdens on Him.

 

You can’t bear it – He can.

 

So do yourself a favour and hand it all over.

 

Ok Lord. I’ll try. Again.

 

You have to do better than try my dear.

 

Ok.

Ok.

Hmmmmmm…

Here’s some.

No?

Ok, here’s most.

Still not good enough?

You do drive a hard bargain.

Well, it’s not easy.

It’s not easy at all, but here’s

A

L

L

.

For the final time, concerning this issue Lord, I surrender ALL.

Have your way, and let your perfect will be done.

****************************************************

image courtesy

So, dear readers

What do you do when your heart /human self wants to do one thing but

your conscience/spirit self won’t let you?

 

Fight it?

Go ahead and do what you want anyway?

Surrender and admit you need help?

 

Or…something else?

This is quite old, but I don’t know how many of you have seen these pictures of “grown men” – some with wives and children – putting their lives at risk unnecessarily…men! Humph!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

More “men acting dangerously” photos at Bit Rebels.

 

Have a lovely week everyone. And please stay/act safe.

 

But for the fact that I can see my last post date, it’s almost impossible for me to believe it’s been three months since I put up a post….3 months? waoh!

 

I won’t even attempt to come up with any reason(s) for abandoning the blog. All I want to do is apologise to all those who follow and/or read Anoda Phase – for abandoning my passion for writing and for allowing cobwebs to gather on here, but more so, for neglecting my responsibility to you all.

I also want to thank all those who kept checking on the blog/catching up on their reading/commenting on old(er) posts etc. It’ very humbling to know that I didn’t put up new posts for 3 months and my blog was still getting reasonable traffic. Thanks also to all who have liked and continue to like Anoda Phase on Facebook.

So, happy new year to you all (better late than never, right?) I trust that everyone is well.

It is my prayer that this year, you will align yourselves with the Lord’s plans for your lives, and experience genuine transformation, growth, increase, freedom, and favour unlimited.

As for me, I’m thankful for both seen and unseen blessings – on the last day of 2011, I got an unexpected blessing – actually, I did expect it – ok let me explain better;

Around October/November (I think) 2011, I heard something on the news and I proclaimed that I would be a beneficiary of that thing in Jesus’ name. I then completely forgot about it, and you can only imagine my initial confusion, surprise, disbelief, and then utter gratitude, when on December 31 2011, I received a letter – and a cheque – in the post.

Also, hubby and I are trusting God for a miracle which initially seemed veeeery far away, but is now inching ever so close, and we are thankful and trustful that it will come sooner than later, and we shall testify again.

I’m thankful for unseen/yet to be seen blessings – What are you thankful for?

Don’t forget, we have a TESTIMONY CORNER on this blog.

 

Early last month, I had a conversation with a family member, and let’s just say I came out of that conversation feeling like a failure.

 

They practically used an area of my life that is currently a “challenge” to insult me, and oh, it hurt – really, truly, deeply, hurt. I cried, and cried, and then cried some more.

 

I was broken to many pieces and was at an all-time low for a while – I even contemplated doing something that I’m ashamed to say I even thought about – I lost interest in many things, blogging included.

 

In all of these though, I had to fake being okay for my hubby and others’ sake (I gave hubby an abridged version of what happened).

 

I took the matter to the Lord and rather than ask “Why me?” or such other questions, I tearfully begged Him to remember me, and look upon my case and turn it around to favour me.

 

I haven’t got the answer yet, but I see good signs, and “I hear the sound of abundance of rain”. I trust that in His own perfect and right time, the Lord will answer me and put a new song in my mouth.

 

Why am I writing this? You may wonder…Well, it’s not so I can attract a pity-party and accumulate “sorries” and “it will be wells” (even though I’ll appreciate them).

 

…It’s simply so (hopefully) I can finally let the pain and hurt out of my physical body, and get back to doing the things that I truly enjoy (e.g. blogging and reading other blogs– lol). For this reason, I’m turning off comments on this post.

 

I came across this prayer in a book I read a few months ago – The Millionaire Joshua by Catherine Ponder – and if you are hurting or have been hurt by anyone recently, then please say the prayer with me:

 

“I now fully and freely forgive and release everything and everyone, who needs it, of the past or present – I forgive and release everyone – I am free and they are free too – All things are cleared up between us now and forever”

Amen!

 
PS: After typing this post in the morning, I went off to read my Bible and pray. Guess what I came across?

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
and streams in the wasteland.”
Is 43:18-19

 

 

 

 

 

 – I can’t even begin to think what must be on the minds of these children – do they really  plan to start the generator? And the one with his leg on the Gen? lol.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – someone had so much time, probably while waiting for the soup, to turn his eba into a face??? (PS: Eba ia made from garri, a staple starchy food in Nigeria)

 

 

 

 

 

 – I saw this on Facebook sometime ago, and while I hope it’s a fabrication/joke, I can’t help but wonder: if someone sent you this message on Facebook, what would you do? laff it off? delete the person asap? pass a caption of the message around for laffs?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – Unique – this “bed-dress” or what do I call it? I actually like it…but a bit creepy? No?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – Imagine if this became an official mode of transport. For women. Or perhaps, for better comic relief, for men! lol.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – Mr Ibu (Nigerian Comedian) on a movie set – no further comments.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – Want to be a millionaire? Answer the question!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – A cockerel is a sheep? LWKPH!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 – I say Amen! What do you say?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have a fantastic weekend.

 

 

Oh, how I’d love to have long natural nails like the ones pictured….

 

I’ve always liked long, well-groomed, natural finger nails, but that’s something I’ve not been able to enjoy.

 

My finger nails grow fast, but they are so soft, and they get broken very easily, so they never stay long.

 

I’ve tried several nail hardeners and other products (in fact, I just got a nail and cuticle cream from Boots this afternoon), I take good care of my hands, and I try to get regular  manicures, but so far, nothing has worked in enabling me to grow and keep the long nails I want.

 

Several years ago, I wore French manicure nails quite often, and getting them off always hurt my natural nails, but I have no idea if that has contributed in any way to the lack of strength of my natural nails.

 

I must also mention that I have short nail beds – does that hamper nail growth/strength?

 

Any tips or product ideas on how to grow my natural nails? Please hook a sister up.

 

Cheers.

 

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